Recently a guy I’ve known for a short time called me a ” Complainer ” !
What he didn’t understand, and refused to see, was that I wasn’t ” complaining “.
I was merely standing up for myself, and questioning his disrespectful treatment.
I was sick and tired of his bull ! Constantly he was always full of excuses for his behavior, instead of seeing how completely wrong he was being towards me !
He must have thought I was completely stupid if he ever for a moment thought I was going to accept his multitude of excuses.
Even now, days after the last time I spoke to him, I still can’t believe how he actually expected me to be ” okay ” with the way he treated me.
I was always the ONLY ONE that was supposed to be ALL of the effort into our ” relationship ” – IF it could have ever really been called that.
Plus apparently it was always ” okay ” for him to whine and complain about every little thing in his life, but when I stood up for myself then I was in the ” wrong ” !
I showed him tons of limitless patience for a long while, until he pushed me way over my breaking point. I couldn’t take anymore from him.
I had told him several times that if two people truly love each other then there has to be an equal ” give and take “. I reminded him that it can not be ” one-sided “, or it simply won’t work. Obviously he never truly listened to me, and / or he simply didn’t care.
He always swore to me that he loved me, and that I was the ONLY ONE that he really loved. For him that apparently was just an empty and meaningless expression, and nothing more. He was always good at spewing out ” pretty words “.
Looking back now I can see that he must truly believe that it’s ” okay ” to tell people simply whatever they want to hear, no matter whether you truly mean it, or not.
He plays with women’s hearts and emotions like it was just another video game to him.
So his statement during our last conversation / fight that I am a ” Complainer ” was meaningless to me, because all I have to do is consider the source of that statement.
Coming from him, that accusation meant NOTHING AT ALL !
After all, What right did HE have to call me a ” Complainer ” when at least 75 to 80 % of the time that’s ALL he ever did ! He’d complain about everything from whining that he didn’t have ” exactly ” what he wanted to fix for a meal in his kitchen, to whining that one of his ” best friends ” that he would always praise, didn’t come over when they had promised to.
I’ve got NEWS for him !
When there are millions and billions of people starving in the world, it’s pretty damn shallow of him to whine that he doesn’t have exactly what he wants to eat for a specific meal ! He should be happy that he had food at all in his kitchen, no matter what was in there ! I had tried to explain this concept to him during several different conversations, but he could never grasp it. He has too much of a belief that he should ALWAYS have EVERYTHING he wants… WHENEVER he wants… no matter what !
Well, LIFE doesn’t work that way ! He needs to grow up, and start understanding that !
Also, even though I did understand the disappointment he felt when his ” best friend ” didn’t come over when he had told him he would, still he needs to understand that sometimes plans change ! Life is not set in stone no matter how much we wish it was sometimes ! Even a ” best friend ” that you’ve known for years will every now and then let you down because they have to change plans at the last minute. Things happen !
It’s NOT the End of the World ! At least it’s NOT as tragic as he made it out to be.
I suppose immaturity is the key word I need to refer to when describing him.
Even though he’s in his 30’s, he still acts like a teenager, or even a pre-teen, who thinks that EVERYTHING should ALWAYS go HIS WAY… ALWAYS !
Wake up and Smell the Coffee !
I know I am NOT a ” Complainer ” no matter what he said during the last time I talked to him. But I am NOT about to contact him ever again to explain myself to him, because I know that no matter what I said to him it would fall on completely deaf ears !
He would definitely not truly listen to even one word I said, and he would not truly care about anything I said either !
Good Luck to Him because with the attitude he carries around with him he is going to need it ! No one is ever going to want to be close to him, and stay close to him, while he continues to behave as he does…. always insisting that HE comes FIRST, and NOTHING ANYONE ELSE WANTS MATTERS !